Humorous Pet Peeves Speech

As I was debating what to speak about for my final speech, I decided to talk about my pet peeves. I feel this topic is relevant to everyone because everyone has a pet peeve. I found this speech quite humorous and decided to post it on my blog. I mean I did just write it 2 hours ago. :)


Intro:
We all like pets. Those fuzzy, cuddly things we like to play with. But I am not going to talk about those pets today, I am going to talk about the pets we all hate. The pets that never leave us along. The pets you can never get away from. The pets that follow you everywhere.

Body:
1. These pets always seem to pop up when you are with your friends. You are relaxing, watching a movie and then here they come. The person behind you innocently starts cracking their knuckles. Then, before you know it, knuckle cracking spreads like an infectious disease throughout the room. Everyone seems to have a fascination with a pet that you can’t stand.
2. These pets don’t just infect your friend group, however, they seem to follow you into your classrooms as well. While enjoying another exciting and enlightening day in class the teacher decides to assign an insane amount of assignments. Of course, this wouldn’t be so bad if you actually knew what you were supposed to be doing. Unfortunately, it is once again a guessing game as to what the requirements are for the assignment. Now if it wasn’t bad enough that you had knuckle popping tagging along to class, you now have another pet nagging at your nerves.
3. These pets couldn’t just stay at home when you go to work. Nope! They come right along for the ride. While working on routine tasks your brain shifts into autopilot because of how many times you have done this particular task. You have done this task inside out, outside in, and from all other possible angles you could have. But wait, here it comes, that crazy, corrective, co-worker you can’t stand. As the co-worker stands there explaining the one hypothetical angle that you decided wasn’t worth your time to try, you play over and over again in your head all the places you would rather be. Even if you could get away from this co-worker there is no place you could go that would be alleviate your anxiety. The pets have infested all areas of your life. Nowhere is safe. Knuckle popping, gigantic load of homework due tomorrow, and annoying know-it-all-ten-times-better-than-you, are following at your heels.

Conclusion:
So what could you possibly do to find some safe sane sanctuary to get away? I am not going to say this sanctuary is easy to get to, but the good news is that it is possible. Unlike the fuzzy, cuddly pets I talked about earlier, these pets are not real. These pets reside within your head. And just like most diseases there is a remedy to getting ride of them. You need to realize all areas of your life while have pets that you don’t like, but you must learn to leave them there. Do not allow these pets to infect the rest of your life and make your day worse. You must also understand that everyone has different pets that they hate and others they don’t mind. You can help to alleviate others anxiety by not contributing to their personal grievances against particular pets. In turn, you can ask those people not to bring along the pets you hate. So even though everyone hates at least one of these pets, there is a remedy for not allowing them to infect your life.